Relationships-Challenges, Rewards, and Celebrations

Promising to take someone to see the Northern Lights has its challenges, rewards, and celebrations. The Northern Lights are an unpredictable (to some degree) weather related phenomenon.

Seeing the Northern Lights together was a commitment made, to me many years ago, and kept this past year. Next week we celebrate 30 years of marriage, all of challenges we have faced and rewards we have celebrated, together.

We married very young, at least by today’s standard, at the age of 20 and 21. Our union was the beginning of two people becoming “us”.

As imperfect people we brought our imperfections into the marriage. What has kept us together, as we became and will still become a better “us”, is grace.

In any relationship there are always opportunities to:

• Remember

• Repeat

• Reconcile

Remembering for better and/or worse times helps show the foundations and new starting points (growth) in a relationship. Focusing on the negative (bad) in a relationship is not helpful. Also, pretending all is good when it isn’t does not help protect “us” long term either. Focusing on the positive (good) about each other and the relationship needs to remain a priority.

The day we married our invitations read, “Today I marry my best friend, the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.” Today we still do, a little older and hopefully a whole lot wiser.

Repeating (doing) things that have meant something to each of other and in the relationship is one way to keep “happy” as a priority. What is important to the other person, matters in a healthy relationship.

We have fun together. We are very different and that’s ok, even good most of the time. A willingness to share life and experience different things together keeps our relationship “new” every year.

Reconciling while not fun, (well maybe sometimes) is necessary. No one person or relationship is perfect. A commitment takes time, requires effort and is sustained through reconciliation (forgiveness).

We value one another and the relationship more than the need to always be right. We are not perfect, we are committed. We still choose to love, honor, cherish and reconcile as neeeded.

The best things in life truly are the people you love, the places you visit, and the memories you make over many years.